Day 28: Attack of the clones

It was war today. You see I was traveling through a nice little forest today.

 It was really quite pretty.

 When suddenly these shadows started following me.

 Come to find out these shadows were me! They did not come in peace.

 These two pictures show me and the other mes sat down for a peace talk.

 It came down to a battle at the end in front of a well.

 A well of infinite blackness.

I lost.

 Well, no that is not what happened. I just went to the science museum and it had a hall of mirrors. It was pretty trippy.

Also in my journey I found a rare creature. A croc store. I can't believe those are still around. Or were ever around.

 Below is probably the one picture of my food you will ever see. Yes, that is a pizza it is not a regular pizza though. No, that is rice pizza! To be more specific octopus and kimchi. It was delicious. The crust was literally made out of rice. See the blow pic.

My days was a day full of museums walking and good food. It was in all honesty a great day.

Day 27: Legal myths and legends Pt. 1

Well ladies and gentlemen I have decided to do something fun for the next couple of days. I am going to write about legal myths and legends. These are things like crazy laws throughout the US or some other interesting myths created by the culture. Now this started off as a response to a list of crazy Utah laws and just some thoughts about weird legal things in general. So let's start with the karate means you must register your hands and feet as lethal weapons myth for today. Tomorrow, or today for me I guess, I will do a different post discussing other crazy laws I have heard about. Now for the registered weapons.


The short answer is: no a karate or martial arts master does not have to register his hands as lethal weapons. Now we have always heard this myth. It's something perpetrated throughout Hollywood. See e.g.,The Stuff, Larco Productions (1985). Further, I think the mythos surrounding martial arts (east Asian especially) makes the culture believe that of course this man has training, so of course he should be deadly in fisticuffs. I mean just look at what Bruce Lee could do. If he could do all of that he is of course deadly. Shouldn't people know? Which, in some ways, makes sense, until you think about it. No seriously really consider it. Bruce Lee and other martial artists are dangerous because of training and strength. So should any and every strong person register their hands and feet as lethal weapons? Or what about a 16 year-old kid that kills a soccer referee via a single punch? Shouldn't he have registered his hands as lethal weapons? The answer should be clear. It should be a no, because that's stupid. Let's extend this proposition to other items. Should I register my kitchen knives as deadly weapons? No, even though they kill far more people than fists. If we were to register fists as weapons then why not register: baseball bats, golf clubs, lawn mowers, cars, rocks, 2x4s, shovels, axes, metal wire, bleach, and any other number of potentially murdery things. That makes no sense whatsoever. However, more compelling than that is the fact that courts when considering whether or not hands and feet are dangerous look not at the persons martial artistry but at their intent. See People v. Saleh, 45 P.3d 1272, 1275 (Colo. 2002). In short, it's a myth. Hands need not be registered weapons. Also, intent is what matters, not necessarily skill. To close this off watch this exchange from Batman Begins.
For those that can't watch this clip the important part goes as follows:

WAYNE

That man had a gun.

DUCARD

Would that stop you?

WAYNE

I've had training

DUCARD

The training is nothing. The will is everything. The will to act.

*I apologize for the fonts they seem to not want to change in the actual blog. But for some reason are uniform in the draft.

Day 26: Another short post

Sorry friends I am very busy this evening with a second webinar in as many days. I will have a longer post tomorrow when I have more time. Suffice it to say, today was a good day.

Day 25: Just another day in the neighborhood

Today ladies and gents was another average day. Got legal work done. Ate food. Talked about Godzilla with Ringo. It was really just an average day. However, I don't have time to write much about anything today, since I have a webcast to attend and laundry to do. So let me say friends peace out my homies!

Day 24: GODZILLA!

That's right I saw Godzilla in Hong Kong, y'all can be jealous now. Ringo and I went to go see it together, as Hong Kong homies are apt to do. Let me say, I enjoyed it immensely. I felt like a ten year old again as I was all like whoa. Did you see when he just bit that monster in the face. ATOMIC BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously though I thought it was a well done movie. Now, was it the best movie of all time? No. But it was certainly above the norm for most movies. I give this an 8/10 and advise people that they should go see it. I thought the reveal for Godzilla was perfect by only showing bits and pieces and first. The effects were awesome. While there may have been too much peopling and not enough Godzillaing I'm okay with it because at least the actors were passable, not great (except Ken Wantanabe dudes a pimp). That was the highlight of my day.

Well friends I am off to sleep may you dream--like I'm sure I will--that you get to ride on Godzilla's back.

Day 23: All bites and pure itch makes Scott...something something

Go crazy? Don't mind if I do. ajkdbfasdjhbvaljkhleihgakvn lajhsjfgdnlaik.uengt'iyva s;idfuht['08a;ukbdvoahfkja vliakjds gl;aohnfdlvjakshdfvlhfn 'ba;ejv ali houwegboaiejf lierhf ['jks df.

Yes, yes I can feel it seeping into me the madness that is caused by incessant horrible nasty itching. Hour by hour minute by minute the urge to scratch and scratch. To feel that electric thrill of momentary relief followed by a redoubling of itchiness. That ever perpetuating cycle of misery and woe. This Dantean torture that afflicts me at all hours of the day. The Hell! The horror! I feel that one day when I am grown and in court, many years after this experience, I will be cross examining a key witness. Then I hear thousands of high pitched buzzing wings coming towards me in the court room. A black cloud of blood sucking horror flies through every crevice and hole. I then look at my co-counsel and say, "They found me. I don't know how but they found me. Run for it MARTY!"

The other attorney will ask, "Who?"

"The Hong Kong mosquitoes!" I reply.

And, and, and. . . oh. Guys. . .I can't feel my leeeeeeegs! That's because anti-itch cream I finally bought is working. The madness is gone nothing to see here. Although that does sum up my day nicely. The itching drove me insane!!!! So much so I bough a small tube of anti-itch cream which feels like icy hot. I don't even care though the itching is gone and I am as sane as I ever am. That is to say I am merely hovering on the brink of madness. Other than that my day was normal. As per usual I bought 12L of water today, nice big jugs of em! So I should be set for most of the week now. Also, work today went well and I had a grand ole time at work. The itching kept me up until 2:00AM last night so that was awful. All in all not a bad day if one discounts the itching.

Well friends I am off again to relax and enjoy not feeling my legs.

(who can catch the most movie/TV references?)

Day 22: Revengening

Yes, I committed revenge on a group of the most vile animals on this planet. I killed every mosquito I saw. I assume that these mosquitos asked themselves as they died, "What can bugs do against such reckless hate?" To which I reply, "Nothing you parasites." Then they sued for peace by fleeing. I said, "Peace? There can be no peace. DIE!"(I quoted to movies just then can you tell me what ones?) That was the most exciting thing I did this Sunday. I went to war. And I won!

Today was a normal Sunday for me, just a time to relax and rest. Although in priesthood today I heard something that reinforced what I already knew but was phrased quite well. The teacher said, "We are not happy when we acquire material goods. Only when we share the love Christ do we find happiness."

With that written. I am off goodnight all.

Day 21: There's over 9000!!!!!!!

Alright ladies and gentlemen, today was a pretty good day. I went to the 10,000 Buddhas Monastery. That is seriously one amazing place. No, like if you ever get the chance to go there you should, without question. Although, I would offer one suggestion, bring bug spray. No seriously bring a lot of it. I got at least 10 new mosquito bites and another 5 kills to go along with that. My ankles are so itchy right now it is ridiculous! Ah, but it was so worth it. I will simply let my pictures do the talking for me.

Found in a 7-11 that was 60 steps (yes I counted) from another 7-11

Actual houses

Where people live in Hong Kong (not houses)

Ooo farfalla! Farfalla vendetta!

That's a lot of Buddhas

Ah, my old enemy--stairs.

Below is a video of what I was like at the top.

 Just skip to 1:30.

A downward look at the stairs

I will let the other pictures do the talking for themselves. This was a beautiful place, and everyone needs to go see it. After that I just went home. My head was pounding and it's still pounding. Good night all.

Day 20: Stark contrasts

So, after work today I went to the night market on Temple Street on the southern end of Kowloon. To understand temple street you have to understand that it is nothing more than an open air street market. The type you see only at fairs and such in America. And it is there on Temple Street every day. They have so much stuff there. Just stuff of everything touristy stuff, electronic stuff, naughty stuff (hidden from view in a back alley of course, they did make it obvious via signs though), open air seafood restaurants (the Spicy Crab was delicious!), just awesome stuff. Below are some pictures:

 That is where I ate. Yes all of them are currently alive.

 Baby shirt!

 I want this shirt. It has Bruce Lee!

 Little baby shirt!

 Baby boy shirt!

In case of cars. Do the Matrix!

These markets are completely different than the malls and shops you find walking through other parts of Hong Kong, especially central. There it is all high tech and clean, almost like walking around a lab. Here, no high tech, except their stuff, just the open air haggling and a lot of people speaking Cantonese laughing at the guy that looks like he got rained on even though the sky is perfectly clear (hint that's me).

Well friends I must away ere break of day to find the long forgotten gold. Here is a preview of what I will be like tomorrow (skip to 00:37):

Day 19: SKULLET!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, ladies and gentlemen I saw a man sporting a skullet. For those who don't know a skullet is a cross of hairdos, where the front is completely bald and the back has long hair. Yes, I saw that today. It was insane. For further reference consider this picture I pulled from Google:

So Majestic

In any event that was on my way to work. I traveled a different path on my way home and found a restaurant called Western Papa. It was a really good restaurant. Seriously, really good. It was Italian, but not Italian-Italian, or American-Italian, it was Asian-Italian. I...I am not even sure how to explain it but the spices and flavors were fairly Asian with a bit of Italian for good measure. Look, you'll just have to go to Hong Kong to understand what I mean, but trust me it was not your Papa's Italian. For example: you could get pasta with curry sauce, or a crab dish with pumpkin sauce. I had the penne pesto with pan seared duck breast. It was delicious! Also below is a pic of their menu. Me thinks they didn't change the template:

Hint: that language is not Italian, although it does stem from Rome.

Well ladies and gentlemen I am off to see the wizard (read sleep) the wonderful Wizard of Oz (sleep).

Day 18: Breakfast, a hard time to find a spoon

Guys, maybe girls too I don't know, but guys specifically if you don't have a dishwasher and must hand wash your dishes do them as soon as you finish (or as soon as you can I'm not particular). Especially if you have roommates. Even more especially if you have roommates you don't know. It's basic hygiene guys. That and it saves everyone time. With that said, yes I couldn't find a spoon because they were all buried in my sink that glows at night. And yes I did clean. And yes I want to cut off my hands for reaching in there. And yes this is a passive-aggressive attempt at complaining, but I am the sole writer for this blog and you're not so you have to read every dang word I have to write!

In other news, work was good. I have been invited to go see some proceedings here in Hong Kong that my firm is in on Friday so I will be going there. It will be interesting to see what happens! Also, last night there was lightning so close and thunder so loud that my windows shook. More of that is on the way. With that happy thought I am out. Have fun and remember WASH...YOUR...DISHES!

Day 17: Newsies (in Hong Kong)

So, today I was walking down the street and I see a sight I have seen every day since I have come to Hong Kong. People hawking newspapers. This time, however, I was listening to my music when the song "Carrying the Banner" from Newsies the Musical came up as I was walking past a string of like six of these newsies. Now (for those who don't know), Newsies is a show about news boys in New York in the early 20th century who strike because of unfair prices on their papers. I Hong Kong the newsies are not boys. No, they are generally women and geriatric. As as I was passing her I started thinking, "What if they made a musical about newsies in modern Hong Kong." I encourage you all to imagine the same. More specifically the King of New York scene (link is for your benefit) with walkers, canes, and dentures. Here are some lyric changes I thought of within the past 30 seconds.

USA (to the tune of Santa Fe)

"Let me goooooooooo far away. Somewhere, dried fish won't ever find me. And tomorrow won't remind me of today. When the city's finly sleeping and the clouds are still dark gray. I get on a plane bound for the USA...Where does it say I have to live in a high rise...I need space and fresh air...etc." (Look I wrote that in 30 seconds so hush.)

Watch what happens (to the musical exclusive song Watch What Happens)

"Those grannies will live and breath right on the page and watch what happens...Just look around at the world we are giving them and then one they'll create they're mistake is they're young that is not I mistake we ever made then we were old forever!"

Sheung Wan's Here (to the tune of Brooklyn's Here. I imagine the Sheung Wan newsie leader is still known as Spot Conlon)

"We're your friends from that Dried Seafood street now. University, and Soho Hong Kong. District that gave me birth. Friendliest place on earth. Pay us a visit and see that is true. And when you do we'll kick up to Kowlooooooooooooooon!"

In any event that was the most interesting thought in my head today.

Well, as for work it went well and I had a good ole time looking up some Hong Kong family law. Well guys I have to go other things must be done today!

Day 16: The Beginning of Week 3

Well ladies and germs it's the beginning of work week 3 and it has been a doozy today. I got assigned several cases in various subject areas and that was exciting! As is tradition the office provided lunch for us all today and we got some Vietnamese food, I got a rice and curry dish nothing fancy but golly was it delicious. Also, today I decided to walk from my apartment to my work place. Not only was my commute shorter but I got just as sweaty as otherwise. So I came to the realization, I reach a saturation point and it is as soon as I step outside my room so what's the point? Well, I am off for tonight children may you all have fun in your various locations ranging from Singapore to good ole Utah!

Day 15: A day of rest

Well, as is my plan for Sundays I go to church come home and relax. And that is exactly what I did. Not much to report today except that I am sore beyond belief from the waist down. I woke up stiff and barely able to move, but once I started moving I loosened up a bit. With emphasis on a bit. Well good friends this is it for today. Have fun.

Day 14: I conquered the Peak

Well, today I decided to hike up Victoria's Peak. Granted, the hike isn't quite like you would find in say, Bryce Canyon, but it was very steep. Sure, it may have been paved but it was quite steep and quite long. That hike was brutal. By the time I had made it to the top I was drenched in sweat from head to toe. It was brutal it was nasty but it was so worth it. Of course, I could have taken the tram and cut down the journey by about half, but that wouldn't have been the same. Journey, before destination, my friends. This was pretty much all I did, considering that it rained in the morning and the hike both down and back took awhile. However I did stop by the Hong Kong Zoo and Botanical Gardens and that was pretty fun. However, instead of typing I am just going to let my pictures do the talking.

  I have been to the top of the mountain you shall worship me as though I were a god! (I shortly sat on bench after that shot and cried for like twenty minutes. I regret nothing.)

I, I don't even know what they are trying to say here.

 Hello, FREAKS!

 Fighting flamingos!

 What a happy tortoise!

Ah, my brother the orangutan!

Day 13: Of Lasers and Ramen

Alrighty friends and readers here is part of my mysterious weekend plans. Tonight, I ate ramen, we'll discuss that later, and went to the Hong Kong Victoria Bay Light Symphony. First, for the ramen. Mind you this is my first time eating legitimate ramen, and no all you law students and college undergrads Top Ramen is not in fact ramen its wax flavored like broth. I got a soyu ramen, ramen with a soy sauce type broth, and golly bob howdy was it delicious. Dear intrepid restauranteurs in Utah, bring in some decent ramen. No, I mean seriously I want some ramen. I know Mexican food is king in the state, and for good reason, but a little ramen for me? I would personally keep your business afloat I can promise you that! Seriously though guys if you get the chance get real ramen. It's amazing!

Now for the light show! It was a really cool experience with lasers and lights and just all around awesomeness. I wasn't able to get a good pic or video of the show itself, but below are some shots of the skyline from the Kowloon side of the bay.

This is just a cool shot and I liked it

Same with this one

PANORAMALAMADINDONG!

When I left the office my hair was just fine. That single strand dropped because of one reason! I bet you can guess what that was.

Okay I lied. I got one okay shot of the show.

Day 12: Oh so that's why no one cooks in anything but the microwave

Well, I finally figured out why no one ever cooks here, and no it's not because we're a bunch of guys, it's because the one thing that can actually cook a thing doesn't work. So, that's a fun and exciting prospect! In any event old chums that was about the most exciting thing in my day. I was already to start frying up some veggies and then whamo no working cooking implement. Fun stuff friends fun stuff!

In other news I would like to make a shout out to a dedicated Canadian reader Michael Despres. You sir are good people.

Work today was pretty much the same. I'm getting into a groove now which is nice. Come back this up coming weekend for more exciting adventures. Who knows where I'll go this weekend (hint I do).

Day 11: Pho, work, and being a domesticated man

So, I've noticed that my blog talks a lot about food. I don't care. I love food so you can suck it if you don't like it. In any event, today I had some pho (for those who don't know it's a Vietnamese soup, more or less). The place I went to was called pho26 and it is in Sheung Wan. It was really good. Sure, I may have sweated through the whole process but it was so dang tasty! I would definitely go back there. It was very good.

For work today I started doing some research on Hong Kong trademark law. It was pretty interesting stuff. However, nothing really big and exciting happened today it was just another day at the office.

Although, and my wife will be glad to read this, I am going to be experimenting with cooking for myself for awhile. Tomorrow's dish? Udon vegetable stir fry. Let's see how that goes! Also, I just started washing my first batch of clothes, another thing my wife will like to hear. In any event, stay thirsty my friends.

Day 10: Sweat is delicious

Hello everyone. Today's post will be a shorter one. Not much happened today. Although, I did drink some sweat. No, not just my own. An actual drink called Pocari Sweat (for those new to the blog I posted about it earlier). It was actually pretty good.

Today, I just worked. I got an assignment looking up if a certain company needs a license to sell some products here in Hong Kong. All in all not a really exciting travel day. Maybe next time true believers!

Day 9: Pork liver Asian Chimchangas...mmmm (satisfied gargling)

Yes, you read that right pork...liver...chimis! And holy pig liver were they delicious! Seriously some of the best things I've had while here in Hong Kong. That is unless my boss Mr. T.K. So was just teasing me, because I bought his story hook line and sinker. Today, as it is every Monday or so Ringo tells me, the firm goes out to lunch to a place nearby. Now, this lunch we went to a place that serves dim sum and other things family style. Now, I am not sure what these delectable Hong Kong chimis are called but I want more of them they were so good. Further, they had some sweeter dessert type things that were at the restaurant as well all of which were delicious. This lunch today was pretty amazing! I would go back there again, although if it was with my family I wouldn't tell them they ate pork liver chimis until well after the fact.

Work today was pretty fun. I got to do some research for some landlord tenant issues. After I was assigned some immigration work. I love all these different assignments I have been assigned. It has been a lot of fun. Seriously, I would suggest this firm to any and all that wanted to work here in Hong Kong.

After work I decided to do some more exploring and went past another three 7-11's. Honestly at this point they've become just another part of the scenery there are so dang many of them! However, I found something, again for my brother in law, that I hope will give you all a laugh. Here it is.

It was also pretty humid today. All I can say about the gross amounts of humidity is the above store's name. Fuk tat. Ha ha swears.